The easy answer is that our family was most important to Grandma Bennion. Here are a few things more that I remember about what was important to her:
1. Mother loved her father and mother. Her dad served in WWII. She exchanged letters with him often. She was very happy when her parents moved from California and into our stake in South West Orem--the Sharon West Stake was the name. Grandpa and Grandma Wood would come every Sunday evening and we would read several chapters from the Book of Mormon together and then share a desert that Grandma Wood had made: usually fruit salad, or cream puffs. I loved the cream puffs.
2. Mother love the gospel and taught it to her children. I remember holding Family Home Evening even at a very young age--early 60's. We did it because the Prophet had asked us to do it, and had made wonderful promises to those who would be faithful. Those promises were fulfilled for my parents. We took turns with different parts of the FHE program. As a child I had my opportunities to teach the lesson using flannel board stories. Paper cut-outs would have flannel glued to their backs which made them stick to the flannel board, a little like velcro, but not so hard to remove and move the pieces around. The Children's magazine at that time had pages of preprinted characters that could be cut out and made into flannel board stories. We had boxes of envelops with these stories. So, when it was my turn to give the lesson, I would find a story in felt comfortable with and deliver the message. My Grandmother Wood also kept boxes of every single thing printed by the Church that she could get her hands on. Back in the Berkley, CA days, there was not LDS book store that you could go to and buy what you wanted. Only a visit to Utah meant a visit to an LDS bookstore. So Mom and Grandma both hoarded (for good reason) printed materials from the Church. I have much of that collection for which I am cursed every time we have had to move.
3. Mother was born in 1930, right as the Great Depression was getting underway, and then she lived through the days of rationing during WWII. So it was important to her to use things up, to make do, or to do without. We never wasted things; not food, not old clothing, not anything. It was from my mother that I developed the habit of not throwing anything away. Mother kept a large supply of fabric. At one point we had an entire wall in our basement family room covered with stacked boxes full of fabric remnants and yards that Mom was holding on to. She used to say that we needed a two year supply of fabric as well as food storage. We did have a northeast corner room in the basement as a dedicated food storage room, and it was crammed full of wheat, etc. We also had shelves of bottled fruit and tomatoes in a basement utility room. Add to that a chest freezer full of meat, freezer jam, vegetables, etc. Those who had been through the Depression knew how important food storage was. We will see those days of need again, but it will be after those who remember the Depression are long gone and we will not be prepared. Mother believed in being prepared.
4. My mother was from what I would call a wealthy family. Grandpa Wood was a civil engineer and had money to play with in investments, though my mother usually spoke of the investments as foolish. Grandma Wood was a Cannon, and the Cannons were almost an aristocratic family of Utah. The Bennion boys have a long history of marrying up. My mother and father both loved to tell us family history stories about the Woods, the Cannons, and the Bennions. I knew that much was expected of me because of who my ancestors were. Mother did not love money, and she was not good at managing it. My father spent two years teaching on a Winnebago Indian reservation when Brigham Young High School closed. We didn't see him much in those days. Then Dad got his teaching job at Brigham Young University in the Lamanite Department. Mom had run up a lot of dept keeping us children in school clothes, etc. It was important to her that her children be presentable at school. Dad and Mom worked out a get out of debt quick plan which involved a bit of frugality that they both had learned in their childhoods, and we got the family finances fixed.
5. Mom was impressed with how the Boy Scouts helped me grow as a boy and became involved in it herself. She served as a Cub Scout leader for many, many years. I have the Silver Beaver medal with which she was recognized. It is a treasure to me.
6. When George Cannon (the immigrant) married Anne Quayle, George was concerned with having a posterity. He had noticed that the Cannon family was thinning because most of the Cannons had few children. He wanted to insure that he would have a large posterity and so made a verbal prenatal agreement with Anne that if they could not have children, whether his fault or her fault, that they would divorce so that the other partner could remarry and have children. Anne was agreeable to this. My mother and father both inherited this desire for a great posterity, though the didn't make any such prenup. Mother wanted to have children. We were the most important thing to her. Of course, Mother had the gift of making any child that she worked with feel that they were important to her. This was the case in her Church work and later in life as a Kindergarten teacher. Mother was assigned to work with the least educable students, the ones that the other teachers could not work with. And Mother gave most of these the great gift of feeling important and feeling capable and successful.
7. Mother made Christmas ornaments for her grandchildren. Almost as soon as the grandchildren were coming, Mother began making ornaments. She knew that she could never afford to buy presents for the number of grandchildren she would have. And she wanted to give something of herself, something that hopefully would be treasured. It was a way for her to make a physical connection to her posterity who were too scattered to be with her much.
8. It was important to Mother to have a clean and orderly home, though this was not in priority above having a home in which the children had chores to do. My memory is of a clean and orderly home, though I know in reality that we had clutter to deal with. We were expected to keep our rooms clean, to make our beds, and to help with other chores like washing the dishes, etc. Vacuuming and dusting were regular tasks. But Mother was not, in my opinion, a task master. I was not taught to do my own laundry, as my children have been. But I had plenty of yard work to do instead, which was under the supervision and command of Dad.
9. Mother love Art and Music. We always had a stereo and a record collection of classical music as well as what was called "easy listening" in those days. We also had the sound tracks from the musicals like Oliver, South Pacific, etc. We had all of those songs memorized from playing them over and over and over. We had works of art on display in our home, both paintings and ceramics. Many of my siblings have developed artistically under her encouragement. We were also encouraged musically. In the early years, we all took piano lessons. Eventually this became too much for the family budget, but I continued to play and to teach myself.
10. Intelligence was important to Mother. Her mother was of high intellect, and was one of the few teachers in Utah to have a teaching certificate with no expiration. Mother encouraged me to raise my level of thought, giving me books to read that had been recommended by Hugh Nibley. Mother was always reading, not seldom reading fiction. She enjoyed works of history, philosophy, and other such non-fiction.
That's probably enough for now. The most important thing for mother was to see her children happy, and that meant to see them developing their testimonies in the gospel as well as seeing them progress in the world. But Mother never, to my knowledge, expressed disappointment in a grandchild who was a lapsed Mormon. She let each know that they were of great value to her.
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Sunday, July 30, 2017
Sunday, July 23, 2017
What do you remember most about your mom (grandma)?
I do not remember having much time with my mother when I was little, though I know that at that early age before memories become intact that she would have been mine, all mine. Here are a few of the things I do remember:
1. I remember a summer night lying on a blanket on the back lawn of our Lakewood Dr. home watching the stars together. I don't remember what we discussed, but I saw the heavens for the first time that night.
2. I remember when I was about seven or eight, Mother was trying to get breakfast on the table. I didn't have a chair at the table--no room--but had a chair next to a counter. I don't remember what my problem was, but I was up and causing some commotion. Mother pushed me back into my chair and told me to stay in my seat. The back of my head hit the edge of the counter and split open. Mother had to rush me to the hospital for stitches. My mother was never abusive, but had to endure questioning at the hospital about the injury.
3. I remember her cooking. She made venison pot roast that would rival dishes set before a king. She made fish fillets that rival anything from the fanciest restaurants. She would take Dad's catch and that of the children (a lot of fish, in other words) and fillet them, batter, and fry them. The kitchen table would have a steaming heap of fried fish, and huge pot of rice, and another of string beans. I would melt a large hunk of butter on my rice and string beans, squeeze lemon on the fish, and squirt La Choi on the rice. So, so good.
4. I do not remember being spanked by Mother, but I know that she did it. (Spanking duties usually fell to Dad.) She had a long handled brass candle snuffer that we children called the magic wand, because when mother waved her magic wand, we did whatever she asked.
5. I remember Mother reading chapter books to us when I was young. Her father used to bring a 100 lb bag of walnuts from California when he would visit. We would sit at the kitchen table and shell nuts while Mom read to us. I do not remember any of the books--one was something about tiger eyes, another about a pink motel mystery. We would earn Lifesavers books when we had shelled so many nuts. We worked like demons, and loved every minute of it.
6. Mother would also pay a nickel for me to pick raspberries. We also got a nickel for going through the fields and orchards that surrounded our home and gathering asparagus.
7. When I was about 11 or so, Mother was asked to substitute for my Sunday School class. We were a large class, and unruly. We went through eight teachers in as many months. I didn't think that I was misbehaving--I was unaware of the feelings of others. When I got home from Sunday School that day Dad quite literally threw me across the living room and warned me never to treat my mother that way again. I was confused at the time, but now understand perfectly what was going on. Mother had much more patience than Dad.
8. Some of my memories of Mother involve a lot of regret on my part. One occasion was Friday evening at the end of Scout Camp. The camp held a program and invited families to come. Mine came--something that I wasn't used to because the family was pulled in a lot of different directions. Following the program an announcement was made that refreshments (ice cream bars) would be had at each individual camp site. Of course my friends and I rushed off to the camp. Later I was curious why my family had not come up to the camp site. It never occurred to me that they would not know where it was if I didn't show them the way. Mother went home in tears that I had ignored the family. I was just a clueless boy. Dad, of course, scolded me properly for having made my mother cry.
9. When I was about 15, and coming into my growth, I left the house (without having done my chores) and headed next door to hang out with a friend. Mother caught me at the curb and began to read me the riot act. I was standing on the curb, and she was standing off of the curb, giving me an extra six inches on her. It was the first time that I realized how much bigger than her I was becoming. As she scolded, the thought went through my foolish head that there was no way on earth that she could make me do anything. The temptation to walk off mid-lecture was real. But for the first time, something inside of me knew that a deep and important bond would be broken if I did. I went home and did my chores.
10. Mother used to do her own appliance repairs. We couldn't afford to hire a repair man. Mother would check out a book from the library, tear into the dishwasher or clothes washer, find the problem, remove the worn out of defective part, pick up a new part from the store, install it, and return the appliance to service.
11. Mother received inspiration for her children. When I was about five years old I hooked up with a new best friend. Most of our play was wholesome and innocent, but some of it was not. My friend, I would come to learn over the years, was a victim of sexual abuse by a couple of older cousins (or uncles). My friend would act out with me things that he was learning at the hands of these teenaged boys. One day Mother told me about a dream that she had had. In the dream my friend and I were playing on the edge of a very dangerous cliff. I don't remember anything else about the dream, but even at five, I knew the interpretation of the dream. I was a victim of what we could call "second hand abuse/molestation." My friend would struggle with problems relevant to this throughout his youth. We often say in the Church that Satan cannot tempt little children. This is true, but he can get those in his service to mess with little children in terrible ways. My mother's dream was a great protection to me.
12. I didn't call my mother as often as I should have. But there has always been a deep and abiding connection between us. When I was working for SILO back in Orem Utah, I got a phone call from my sister, Lillian, telling me that Mother had been diagnosed with colon cancer. Since both of my grandmothers had died of this, I took it as a funeral announcement. I was not good on the sales floor for the rest of the day. Mother had half of her colon removed and survived another thirty plus years. Later she would be diagnosed with a bone cancer--a blood/bone cancer that would destroy her ability to produce red blood cells. She would have periodic transfusions the rest of her life.
13. I have followed in my mother's footsteps all of my life. She went back to college late and graduated with a degree in education. So did I. She taught in the public schools for many years. So have I. She left Utah Valley and moved to South West Missouri. So have I. She faced cancer with a determination to remain cheerful and useful. I am trying to do that too.
14. As a member of the bishopric, I was asked to invite my mother to speak in sacrament meeting. Her response was that if the Lord asked her to do it, He would giver her the strength to do it. We decided to wait until mother had a blood transfusion, since that is when her energy would be the highest. This meant that I would not be able to give family members much advance notice that Mother would be speaking. I got the call that Mother's transfusion was OK'ed and we made room for mother on the program that immediate Sunday. She was to be the "youth speaker." We asked her to take five minutes; she spoke for thirty-five. It was one of the best I've ever heard.
15. My mother had an unwavering testimony of the restored gospel of Jesus Christ. I don't remember the words of it, but the sense of it lives in me. I could no sooner deny my testimony of the gospel than I could deny her. I remember as a boy seeing her and my father kneeling in prayer. When I was little she taught me to pray kneeling with me at my bedside every night. This didn't continue much past the age of five because Mother had other little hearts and hands to teach and instruct. Later as a teenager I went through a period of struggle as every teenager does. The habit of daily prayer that Mother taught me was life saving. Evening prayer is a time when the actions of the day come under examination. It is impossible to approach the throne of God without self evaluation--which sometimes makes prayer painful or difficult, or sometimes we may feel like quitting prayer all together. I could not do that, but felt sometimes unworthy to approach our Father in Heaven's throne. The internal conflict was real for me. The pattern of prayer taught by my mother would not give way. I decided that I should pray and ask God if it were right for me to pray when I felt unworthy. (I know that may seem odd, but for a fourteen year old boy, it was a very real concern.) I tried for two weeks to live as I knew that I should. I could not kneel at my bedside any more. Dad and built a triple bunk that my brothers and I shared. Howard and Sam slept together on the bottom, Joe in the middle, and I had the top bunk not any more than three feet from the celling. So I sat up in bed and asked Heavenly Father if it was right for me to pray when I felt unworthy. The answer was the most immediate I have ever had. I heard a voice tell me, "Yes, I love you," and at the same time was washed in the most powerful love I have ever felt.
Ultimately, what I remember about my mother is that her example and her guidance brought me to the Savior. I am sealed to her and to my father, and know that someday I will follow in her footsteps one more time.
1. I remember a summer night lying on a blanket on the back lawn of our Lakewood Dr. home watching the stars together. I don't remember what we discussed, but I saw the heavens for the first time that night.
2. I remember when I was about seven or eight, Mother was trying to get breakfast on the table. I didn't have a chair at the table--no room--but had a chair next to a counter. I don't remember what my problem was, but I was up and causing some commotion. Mother pushed me back into my chair and told me to stay in my seat. The back of my head hit the edge of the counter and split open. Mother had to rush me to the hospital for stitches. My mother was never abusive, but had to endure questioning at the hospital about the injury.
3. I remember her cooking. She made venison pot roast that would rival dishes set before a king. She made fish fillets that rival anything from the fanciest restaurants. She would take Dad's catch and that of the children (a lot of fish, in other words) and fillet them, batter, and fry them. The kitchen table would have a steaming heap of fried fish, and huge pot of rice, and another of string beans. I would melt a large hunk of butter on my rice and string beans, squeeze lemon on the fish, and squirt La Choi on the rice. So, so good.
4. I do not remember being spanked by Mother, but I know that she did it. (Spanking duties usually fell to Dad.) She had a long handled brass candle snuffer that we children called the magic wand, because when mother waved her magic wand, we did whatever she asked.
5. I remember Mother reading chapter books to us when I was young. Her father used to bring a 100 lb bag of walnuts from California when he would visit. We would sit at the kitchen table and shell nuts while Mom read to us. I do not remember any of the books--one was something about tiger eyes, another about a pink motel mystery. We would earn Lifesavers books when we had shelled so many nuts. We worked like demons, and loved every minute of it.
6. Mother would also pay a nickel for me to pick raspberries. We also got a nickel for going through the fields and orchards that surrounded our home and gathering asparagus.
7. When I was about 11 or so, Mother was asked to substitute for my Sunday School class. We were a large class, and unruly. We went through eight teachers in as many months. I didn't think that I was misbehaving--I was unaware of the feelings of others. When I got home from Sunday School that day Dad quite literally threw me across the living room and warned me never to treat my mother that way again. I was confused at the time, but now understand perfectly what was going on. Mother had much more patience than Dad.
8. Some of my memories of Mother involve a lot of regret on my part. One occasion was Friday evening at the end of Scout Camp. The camp held a program and invited families to come. Mine came--something that I wasn't used to because the family was pulled in a lot of different directions. Following the program an announcement was made that refreshments (ice cream bars) would be had at each individual camp site. Of course my friends and I rushed off to the camp. Later I was curious why my family had not come up to the camp site. It never occurred to me that they would not know where it was if I didn't show them the way. Mother went home in tears that I had ignored the family. I was just a clueless boy. Dad, of course, scolded me properly for having made my mother cry.
9. When I was about 15, and coming into my growth, I left the house (without having done my chores) and headed next door to hang out with a friend. Mother caught me at the curb and began to read me the riot act. I was standing on the curb, and she was standing off of the curb, giving me an extra six inches on her. It was the first time that I realized how much bigger than her I was becoming. As she scolded, the thought went through my foolish head that there was no way on earth that she could make me do anything. The temptation to walk off mid-lecture was real. But for the first time, something inside of me knew that a deep and important bond would be broken if I did. I went home and did my chores.
10. Mother used to do her own appliance repairs. We couldn't afford to hire a repair man. Mother would check out a book from the library, tear into the dishwasher or clothes washer, find the problem, remove the worn out of defective part, pick up a new part from the store, install it, and return the appliance to service.
11. Mother received inspiration for her children. When I was about five years old I hooked up with a new best friend. Most of our play was wholesome and innocent, but some of it was not. My friend, I would come to learn over the years, was a victim of sexual abuse by a couple of older cousins (or uncles). My friend would act out with me things that he was learning at the hands of these teenaged boys. One day Mother told me about a dream that she had had. In the dream my friend and I were playing on the edge of a very dangerous cliff. I don't remember anything else about the dream, but even at five, I knew the interpretation of the dream. I was a victim of what we could call "second hand abuse/molestation." My friend would struggle with problems relevant to this throughout his youth. We often say in the Church that Satan cannot tempt little children. This is true, but he can get those in his service to mess with little children in terrible ways. My mother's dream was a great protection to me.
12. I didn't call my mother as often as I should have. But there has always been a deep and abiding connection between us. When I was working for SILO back in Orem Utah, I got a phone call from my sister, Lillian, telling me that Mother had been diagnosed with colon cancer. Since both of my grandmothers had died of this, I took it as a funeral announcement. I was not good on the sales floor for the rest of the day. Mother had half of her colon removed and survived another thirty plus years. Later she would be diagnosed with a bone cancer--a blood/bone cancer that would destroy her ability to produce red blood cells. She would have periodic transfusions the rest of her life.
13. I have followed in my mother's footsteps all of my life. She went back to college late and graduated with a degree in education. So did I. She taught in the public schools for many years. So have I. She left Utah Valley and moved to South West Missouri. So have I. She faced cancer with a determination to remain cheerful and useful. I am trying to do that too.
14. As a member of the bishopric, I was asked to invite my mother to speak in sacrament meeting. Her response was that if the Lord asked her to do it, He would giver her the strength to do it. We decided to wait until mother had a blood transfusion, since that is when her energy would be the highest. This meant that I would not be able to give family members much advance notice that Mother would be speaking. I got the call that Mother's transfusion was OK'ed and we made room for mother on the program that immediate Sunday. She was to be the "youth speaker." We asked her to take five minutes; she spoke for thirty-five. It was one of the best I've ever heard.
15. My mother had an unwavering testimony of the restored gospel of Jesus Christ. I don't remember the words of it, but the sense of it lives in me. I could no sooner deny my testimony of the gospel than I could deny her. I remember as a boy seeing her and my father kneeling in prayer. When I was little she taught me to pray kneeling with me at my bedside every night. This didn't continue much past the age of five because Mother had other little hearts and hands to teach and instruct. Later as a teenager I went through a period of struggle as every teenager does. The habit of daily prayer that Mother taught me was life saving. Evening prayer is a time when the actions of the day come under examination. It is impossible to approach the throne of God without self evaluation--which sometimes makes prayer painful or difficult, or sometimes we may feel like quitting prayer all together. I could not do that, but felt sometimes unworthy to approach our Father in Heaven's throne. The internal conflict was real for me. The pattern of prayer taught by my mother would not give way. I decided that I should pray and ask God if it were right for me to pray when I felt unworthy. (I know that may seem odd, but for a fourteen year old boy, it was a very real concern.) I tried for two weeks to live as I knew that I should. I could not kneel at my bedside any more. Dad and built a triple bunk that my brothers and I shared. Howard and Sam slept together on the bottom, Joe in the middle, and I had the top bunk not any more than three feet from the celling. So I sat up in bed and asked Heavenly Father if it was right for me to pray when I felt unworthy. The answer was the most immediate I have ever had. I heard a voice tell me, "Yes, I love you," and at the same time was washed in the most powerful love I have ever felt.
Ultimately, what I remember about my mother is that her example and her guidance brought me to the Savior. I am sealed to her and to my father, and know that someday I will follow in her footsteps one more time.
Sunday, July 16, 2017
What do I remember most about my teenage years?
Well, this is a tough question. I've spent a long time trying to forget a lot about my teenage years, but here's what I remember the most.
1. It was in the 8th Grade that I became politically aware. I had the most wonderful English teacher, Kaye Woodward. She had the class for a writers committee to write the school play which we then produced as a class. Delpha Card, Orson Scott Card's little sister, was on the committee with me. Together we wrote Politician in the Forest, about Richard Nixon's run for a second term as president. Ms Woodward was working on a masters degree and asked us to present the play to her BYU class that summer. By Summer the situation had politically changed and I rewrote the play to focus on Watergate rather than the previous campaign. The play was a spoof on Robinhood, Fiddler on the Roof, and Watergate. Each of the politician had the name Nixonhood, etc. It began borrowing heavily from the opening scene of Fiddler: "Politician in the forest, sounds crazy, eh. But here in our little village of Not-to-Surewood, you might say everyone of us is a politician in the forest...." It was amazing fun.
2. I ran track in jr high--the 440 yard dash, now the 400 meter dash. On the day of team try outs there were several of us in the race. I was in good shape because I was a newspaper boy and rode my bike a lot. The popular boy in the race was Raymond Showa (a Native American). As we came around the final turn and headed past the grandstands all of the girls were cheering for Raymond. The more they cheered the harder I ran, and took first place. Coach never took the time to teach me or help instruct my training. I did well be testing how far I would full out sprint--about 300 meters. I would begin each race sprinting for the first turn. Then I would slow down to a light jog around the first bend making everyone pass me on the turn. Then with 300 meters to go I would kick into my sprint and pass everyone. Most of the runners would run out of gas trying to keep up with me as we came down the home stretch. My best time was 57 seconds. The state record for jr high was probably about 54 seconds. I wanted to go for that record but never did. Young athletes need direction and coaching which I was not getting. By the end of my ninth grade year I was being beaten in races that I would have won if I had trained. I didn't run in high school. Looking back I wish that I had.
3. I started working as a dishwasher at the Riverside Country Club in Provo Utah, near the Provo River west of the Cougar Stadium. A ward member helped me get the job before I was 16, so initially my parents would drive me to and from work. As soon as I could drive I was driving myself to work and back. Leading community members would to dine and drink often well into the night. The dishwashers would stay until the last table had been bussed so that the dishes would all be done. At the same time I was taking early, early morning seminary--the 6:00 am class--so that I could take an early morning biology class and get enough credits to graduate early. I would get up at 5 a.m. to be to seminary on time. I would pick up a few students on the way. After school, a few nights each week, I would go to work at the country club and get home after midnight. This is not a good schedule to keep, but I have done it much of my life. Glad that I don't have to do it now.
During my Junior year my Seminary teacher, Don Black, held a party at his home to which he invited both his Orem High students and his former students from Provo High. It was a great party. We played a game called "Pass the Body" in which everyone removed their shoes. One person would stand in the middle of a circle and all of the surrounding students would put their feet against the middle students feet/ankles. The person in the middle would then fall to the side while keeping their body stiff and straight. The students lying down in the circle would then pass this middle person around and around. When someone was not able to pass the person--the middle person landed on them, that person became the new middle person and the game continued. So, a beautiful blond girl from Provo High was the "middle man." Of course, I intentionally failed to pass her so that we had an opportunity to meet. Hahaha. Jill Hickenlooper would be a romantic interest of mine for the next several years. We didn't steady date, but we did date from time to time. A funny sequel to this story: when Mom and I went to Nauvoo on our honeymoon there was a play being put on at the Masonic Lodge. Mom was not feeling well so stayed in our motel room and I went to the play alone. You can imagine my surprise when one of the actresses in the play was Jill Hickenlooper. Mom was not very pleased with that and spent the next couple of days trying to figure out how to make me jealous in return.
Anyway, where I was going with this... I wanted to call Jill up for a date after meeting her at the party, but felt like I needed to get to know her better first. I found out that she was a waitress at Marie Calendars restaurant, on State Street very near the current University Mall. So I applied for a dishwasher job at Marie Calendars, and kept pestering them until I got the job where I worked until my mission. Every night the pies that could not be saved over night were set out on the counter for the crew to take home. After everyone had their chance to pick the pies they wanted, I would take any and all remaining pies home to the family. I was riding a bike to work in those days, and I remember riding home with five or six pies stacked on the handle bars in front of me. The pies were great. Sometimes I would take an uncut pie, write a note on it, and deliver it to the door of a girl I wanted to impress. When other kids were playing ring-and-run, I was playing ring-and-pie-and-run. Those were fun days.
3. I started writing poetry when I was in jr high. I still have some of the originals that I wrote. Most of this is trash, which I have kept anyway--partially because I never throw anything away, and partially because I want to remember that when my students first write poetry, it's not going to be that great. It takes years of practice, instruction, and desire to produce good poetry. And even then, it often requires experience--tragedy or other emotionally tumultuous event--to produce great poetry.
I would sometimes wait at the counter after my shift for the other workers to finish their work. Sitting at the counter I would write poetry on the back of the restaurant's paper placemats. I still have a few of those.
4. I had a steady girl friend my Sophomore year and into my Junior year of high school. This was a terrible mistake, and the hurt of it is why I have been so insistent that my kids avoid steady dating. Her name was Kaylynn Pitts. She and I made the kind of plans that kids in love too young make. All of that crashed hard and I spent three or four months in a very dark place called depression. I was busy enough with school and work that I got through the depression all right, but it was a very long time before I got over that relationship. A few years after Mom and I were married (we were living in the home in Pleasant Grove) Kaylynn made contact with me via e-mail. Facebook was not yet invented. After the first e-mail exchange it was obvious to me that she wanted an on-line relationship that I could not give. So on the next exchange I sent a copy of our annual Christmas letter in which each of our children etc. were discussed. Kaylynn's response was just one word, "thanks." I never e-mailed her again. And she has not tried to contact me since either. Old flames have no place in our lives--not even on-line.
5. My Senior year of high school I joined the Friends Club, like Big Brothers, but not part of that organization. I had a friend named Ted Chin. We had a great time together. Ted was selected for the program because he was from a single parent home, and was having trouble at school. He was a great kid.
Through the Friends Club I was introduced to Julie McKee and the Utah County Community Action Coalition. Because I was ready to graduate early, the first half of my Senior year I would leave school at noon and go to the Community Action Agency and volunteer. We started the Youth Action Coalition, or YAC. We found students from several of the high schools in Utah County to be involved and I got to know kids from Spanish Fork, Payson, etc. Our goal was to find kids who were struggling with various issues and help them get involved in something productive. One of the things we pushed for was a youth component to alcohol recovery services.
By the time elections for the Community Action Agency board came up I was eighteen and old enough to be on the board. The youth in our program were consider minors and hence were allowed to vote (this seems odd, but you had to be a minority to vote and youth under the age of 18 are minority). I was elected to a county board of nine members: three from the private sector (business people), three from the community, and three government bureaucrats. We had decision making power over the agency's budget of some $50,000+. I have later come to understand that the push to get me elected to this board was a political move to keep La Rasa (actual representatives of an actual minority group) from getting a seat on the board. I didn't understand this at the time, but now feel a bit used. At the time, I felt pretty important.
6. The other major deal in my teenage years was my involvement in the Boy Scouts. I earned my Eagle at age 14 and received it on Fathers Day, 1972. I was glad to honor my dad that way. My Eagle certificate is signed by President Richard M Nixon. John and Adam's are signed by Bill Clinton, and Jacob's will be signed by Donald Trump. We have quite the collection among us.
I guess that's enough for now.
1. It was in the 8th Grade that I became politically aware. I had the most wonderful English teacher, Kaye Woodward. She had the class for a writers committee to write the school play which we then produced as a class. Delpha Card, Orson Scott Card's little sister, was on the committee with me. Together we wrote Politician in the Forest, about Richard Nixon's run for a second term as president. Ms Woodward was working on a masters degree and asked us to present the play to her BYU class that summer. By Summer the situation had politically changed and I rewrote the play to focus on Watergate rather than the previous campaign. The play was a spoof on Robinhood, Fiddler on the Roof, and Watergate. Each of the politician had the name Nixonhood, etc. It began borrowing heavily from the opening scene of Fiddler: "Politician in the forest, sounds crazy, eh. But here in our little village of Not-to-Surewood, you might say everyone of us is a politician in the forest...." It was amazing fun.
2. I ran track in jr high--the 440 yard dash, now the 400 meter dash. On the day of team try outs there were several of us in the race. I was in good shape because I was a newspaper boy and rode my bike a lot. The popular boy in the race was Raymond Showa (a Native American). As we came around the final turn and headed past the grandstands all of the girls were cheering for Raymond. The more they cheered the harder I ran, and took first place. Coach never took the time to teach me or help instruct my training. I did well be testing how far I would full out sprint--about 300 meters. I would begin each race sprinting for the first turn. Then I would slow down to a light jog around the first bend making everyone pass me on the turn. Then with 300 meters to go I would kick into my sprint and pass everyone. Most of the runners would run out of gas trying to keep up with me as we came down the home stretch. My best time was 57 seconds. The state record for jr high was probably about 54 seconds. I wanted to go for that record but never did. Young athletes need direction and coaching which I was not getting. By the end of my ninth grade year I was being beaten in races that I would have won if I had trained. I didn't run in high school. Looking back I wish that I had.
3. I started working as a dishwasher at the Riverside Country Club in Provo Utah, near the Provo River west of the Cougar Stadium. A ward member helped me get the job before I was 16, so initially my parents would drive me to and from work. As soon as I could drive I was driving myself to work and back. Leading community members would to dine and drink often well into the night. The dishwashers would stay until the last table had been bussed so that the dishes would all be done. At the same time I was taking early, early morning seminary--the 6:00 am class--so that I could take an early morning biology class and get enough credits to graduate early. I would get up at 5 a.m. to be to seminary on time. I would pick up a few students on the way. After school, a few nights each week, I would go to work at the country club and get home after midnight. This is not a good schedule to keep, but I have done it much of my life. Glad that I don't have to do it now.
During my Junior year my Seminary teacher, Don Black, held a party at his home to which he invited both his Orem High students and his former students from Provo High. It was a great party. We played a game called "Pass the Body" in which everyone removed their shoes. One person would stand in the middle of a circle and all of the surrounding students would put their feet against the middle students feet/ankles. The person in the middle would then fall to the side while keeping their body stiff and straight. The students lying down in the circle would then pass this middle person around and around. When someone was not able to pass the person--the middle person landed on them, that person became the new middle person and the game continued. So, a beautiful blond girl from Provo High was the "middle man." Of course, I intentionally failed to pass her so that we had an opportunity to meet. Hahaha. Jill Hickenlooper would be a romantic interest of mine for the next several years. We didn't steady date, but we did date from time to time. A funny sequel to this story: when Mom and I went to Nauvoo on our honeymoon there was a play being put on at the Masonic Lodge. Mom was not feeling well so stayed in our motel room and I went to the play alone. You can imagine my surprise when one of the actresses in the play was Jill Hickenlooper. Mom was not very pleased with that and spent the next couple of days trying to figure out how to make me jealous in return.
Anyway, where I was going with this... I wanted to call Jill up for a date after meeting her at the party, but felt like I needed to get to know her better first. I found out that she was a waitress at Marie Calendars restaurant, on State Street very near the current University Mall. So I applied for a dishwasher job at Marie Calendars, and kept pestering them until I got the job where I worked until my mission. Every night the pies that could not be saved over night were set out on the counter for the crew to take home. After everyone had their chance to pick the pies they wanted, I would take any and all remaining pies home to the family. I was riding a bike to work in those days, and I remember riding home with five or six pies stacked on the handle bars in front of me. The pies were great. Sometimes I would take an uncut pie, write a note on it, and deliver it to the door of a girl I wanted to impress. When other kids were playing ring-and-run, I was playing ring-and-pie-and-run. Those were fun days.
3. I started writing poetry when I was in jr high. I still have some of the originals that I wrote. Most of this is trash, which I have kept anyway--partially because I never throw anything away, and partially because I want to remember that when my students first write poetry, it's not going to be that great. It takes years of practice, instruction, and desire to produce good poetry. And even then, it often requires experience--tragedy or other emotionally tumultuous event--to produce great poetry.
I would sometimes wait at the counter after my shift for the other workers to finish their work. Sitting at the counter I would write poetry on the back of the restaurant's paper placemats. I still have a few of those.
4. I had a steady girl friend my Sophomore year and into my Junior year of high school. This was a terrible mistake, and the hurt of it is why I have been so insistent that my kids avoid steady dating. Her name was Kaylynn Pitts. She and I made the kind of plans that kids in love too young make. All of that crashed hard and I spent three or four months in a very dark place called depression. I was busy enough with school and work that I got through the depression all right, but it was a very long time before I got over that relationship. A few years after Mom and I were married (we were living in the home in Pleasant Grove) Kaylynn made contact with me via e-mail. Facebook was not yet invented. After the first e-mail exchange it was obvious to me that she wanted an on-line relationship that I could not give. So on the next exchange I sent a copy of our annual Christmas letter in which each of our children etc. were discussed. Kaylynn's response was just one word, "thanks." I never e-mailed her again. And she has not tried to contact me since either. Old flames have no place in our lives--not even on-line.
5. My Senior year of high school I joined the Friends Club, like Big Brothers, but not part of that organization. I had a friend named Ted Chin. We had a great time together. Ted was selected for the program because he was from a single parent home, and was having trouble at school. He was a great kid.
Through the Friends Club I was introduced to Julie McKee and the Utah County Community Action Coalition. Because I was ready to graduate early, the first half of my Senior year I would leave school at noon and go to the Community Action Agency and volunteer. We started the Youth Action Coalition, or YAC. We found students from several of the high schools in Utah County to be involved and I got to know kids from Spanish Fork, Payson, etc. Our goal was to find kids who were struggling with various issues and help them get involved in something productive. One of the things we pushed for was a youth component to alcohol recovery services.
By the time elections for the Community Action Agency board came up I was eighteen and old enough to be on the board. The youth in our program were consider minors and hence were allowed to vote (this seems odd, but you had to be a minority to vote and youth under the age of 18 are minority). I was elected to a county board of nine members: three from the private sector (business people), three from the community, and three government bureaucrats. We had decision making power over the agency's budget of some $50,000+. I have later come to understand that the push to get me elected to this board was a political move to keep La Rasa (actual representatives of an actual minority group) from getting a seat on the board. I didn't understand this at the time, but now feel a bit used. At the time, I felt pretty important.
6. The other major deal in my teenage years was my involvement in the Boy Scouts. I earned my Eagle at age 14 and received it on Fathers Day, 1972. I was glad to honor my dad that way. My Eagle certificate is signed by President Richard M Nixon. John and Adam's are signed by Bill Clinton, and Jacob's will be signed by Donald Trump. We have quite the collection among us.
I guess that's enough for now.
Sunday, July 9, 2017
3. What did you love to do in high school?
I attended Orem High from 1973 to 1976.
What did I love to do?
I was on the wrestling team for a while by Sophomore year, but I wouldn't say that I loved it.
I played Seminary Bowl, like Scholars Bowl, but with seminary questions. I loved that. In 9th grade, which was technically Jr. High for me, my team took first place in all of Utah County. We also played Scripture Chase: a game in which a clue is given and the contestants race to see who can be first to find the scripture. The competition to be on the team was fierce. More than 30 students showed up to compete for a spot on the team. We started with a five second clock. Anyone who could not find the scripture in five seconds was eliminated. No one was eliminated. At four seconds no one was eliminated. At three we lost maybe five kids. At two seconds, over twenty kids could still find the right scripture. At one second we got the group down to about twelve. We had to get to six: four team members and two alternates. We had to go to fractions of a second to get to six. Needless to say, we obliterated every team we went up against. A kid from Dixon Jr High took honors as the individual who scored the most speed points, but myself and David Leonhard were second and third. Our team was so good that on one question all four of us found the correct scripture and raised our hands simultaneously--no time had expired. That, I loved.
I was called to be a member of the Seminary Council in 10th Grade. I loved that. I got to associate with some of the best kids in the school. I attended early morning seminary and early early morning seminary. My class started at 6:00 a.m. I loved it. No competition--this was my favorite subject in high school.
I also started my poetry writing when I was in high school. I still have a lot of the poems that I wrote back then. Some of them were published in the school's creative writing annual.
I started singing in the ward choir when I was in high school. My older sisters took me along. I sang base. Whenever there was a Stake Youth musical production I went along. So, though I never took music in school past jr high I got pretty good at it--good enough that I got to sing in the missionary choir that performed when the first stake was formed in Finland.
I loved crashing the dances at Youth Conferences that were held every summer at BYU. It wasn't hard to go to BYU on a Saturday and since these were stake and multi stake events, no one was really aware that there was a kid no one knew.
I loved the Drafting class I took. I was pretty good. These were the days before CAD. My Junior year, I received honorable mention in a state wide drafting competition.
I remained active in my Boy Scout troop during high school. We didn't have a very organized program for 14 and up, so I stayed with the Scout Troop as part of what was called the Leadership Corp. At 16 I was put in as Junior Assistant Scout Master. So, I did a lot of camping and hiking with the Scouts in addition to the back packing I did with my dad.
My scout master ran a river tour company called Cross Tours and Exploration. He hired me as a boatman on two grand canyon tours. That was fantastic. I did the grunt work, but I got paid to go down the Grand on river rafts. I remember on one of those trips sitting around a camp fire with the teenaged kids from the group. I loved to talk about the gospel, and we stayed up very late. I remember telling them that I was a priest in the Aaronic Priesthood and that I could perform baptisms. One of the girls said that she felt going down to the river and getting baptized right then. I told her that we couldn't without a bishop's supervision. I have always loved teaching the gospel more than anything and couldn't wait for my mission call.
I played the piano a little. I was never very good. I took lessons from about age 5 to age 8. After that my parents couldn't afford to continue the lessons, but we had a piano and I taught myself from that point forward. I liked the music of Neil Young and James Taylor and learned to play a few of their songs.
What did I love to do?
I was on the wrestling team for a while by Sophomore year, but I wouldn't say that I loved it.
I played Seminary Bowl, like Scholars Bowl, but with seminary questions. I loved that. In 9th grade, which was technically Jr. High for me, my team took first place in all of Utah County. We also played Scripture Chase: a game in which a clue is given and the contestants race to see who can be first to find the scripture. The competition to be on the team was fierce. More than 30 students showed up to compete for a spot on the team. We started with a five second clock. Anyone who could not find the scripture in five seconds was eliminated. No one was eliminated. At four seconds no one was eliminated. At three we lost maybe five kids. At two seconds, over twenty kids could still find the right scripture. At one second we got the group down to about twelve. We had to get to six: four team members and two alternates. We had to go to fractions of a second to get to six. Needless to say, we obliterated every team we went up against. A kid from Dixon Jr High took honors as the individual who scored the most speed points, but myself and David Leonhard were second and third. Our team was so good that on one question all four of us found the correct scripture and raised our hands simultaneously--no time had expired. That, I loved.
I was called to be a member of the Seminary Council in 10th Grade. I loved that. I got to associate with some of the best kids in the school. I attended early morning seminary and early early morning seminary. My class started at 6:00 a.m. I loved it. No competition--this was my favorite subject in high school.
I also started my poetry writing when I was in high school. I still have a lot of the poems that I wrote back then. Some of them were published in the school's creative writing annual.
I started singing in the ward choir when I was in high school. My older sisters took me along. I sang base. Whenever there was a Stake Youth musical production I went along. So, though I never took music in school past jr high I got pretty good at it--good enough that I got to sing in the missionary choir that performed when the first stake was formed in Finland.
I loved crashing the dances at Youth Conferences that were held every summer at BYU. It wasn't hard to go to BYU on a Saturday and since these were stake and multi stake events, no one was really aware that there was a kid no one knew.
I loved the Drafting class I took. I was pretty good. These were the days before CAD. My Junior year, I received honorable mention in a state wide drafting competition.
I remained active in my Boy Scout troop during high school. We didn't have a very organized program for 14 and up, so I stayed with the Scout Troop as part of what was called the Leadership Corp. At 16 I was put in as Junior Assistant Scout Master. So, I did a lot of camping and hiking with the Scouts in addition to the back packing I did with my dad.
My scout master ran a river tour company called Cross Tours and Exploration. He hired me as a boatman on two grand canyon tours. That was fantastic. I did the grunt work, but I got paid to go down the Grand on river rafts. I remember on one of those trips sitting around a camp fire with the teenaged kids from the group. I loved to talk about the gospel, and we stayed up very late. I remember telling them that I was a priest in the Aaronic Priesthood and that I could perform baptisms. One of the girls said that she felt going down to the river and getting baptized right then. I told her that we couldn't without a bishop's supervision. I have always loved teaching the gospel more than anything and couldn't wait for my mission call.
I played the piano a little. I was never very good. I took lessons from about age 5 to age 8. After that my parents couldn't afford to continue the lessons, but we had a piano and I taught myself from that point forward. I liked the music of Neil Young and James Taylor and learned to play a few of their songs.
Sunday, July 2, 2017
What did I love to do as a kid, before high school?
I loved to play RISK. My brother Joe got me hooked, but quit playing at the point that I beat him. My buddies and I played it all the time.
I loved to go camping and backpacking. My father took me every summer up into the High Uintahs. I spent a lot of time camping with the Boy Scouts as well.
I started a coin collection and would spend some of my paper route money buying coins that I thought were cool. Scott Donaldson and I would ride our bikes down to a coin shop in Provo on a regular basis. This was a time when we could still find silver coins and wheat back pennies in circulation.
I liked to play with Hot Wheels cars and race tracks.
I liked to play neighborhood night games--mostly Hide and Seek.
I liked to go fishing with my dad.
I loved to go to BYU sporting events with my dad. We watched football and basketball back in the day of Virgil Carter, Kresimir Cosic, etc.
I loved to play Ennie Aye Over: two teams, one in the front yard and one in the back yard. The team with the ball calls "Rennie-aye-over," and throws the ball over the house. If the other team catches the ball they run around the house and capture another player by hitting them with the ball. Way fun.
I loved to go camping and backpacking. My father took me every summer up into the High Uintahs. I spent a lot of time camping with the Boy Scouts as well.
I started a coin collection and would spend some of my paper route money buying coins that I thought were cool. Scott Donaldson and I would ride our bikes down to a coin shop in Provo on a regular basis. This was a time when we could still find silver coins and wheat back pennies in circulation.
I liked to play with Hot Wheels cars and race tracks.
I liked to play neighborhood night games--mostly Hide and Seek.
I liked to go fishing with my dad.
I loved to go to BYU sporting events with my dad. We watched football and basketball back in the day of Virgil Carter, Kresimir Cosic, etc.
I loved to play Ennie Aye Over: two teams, one in the front yard and one in the back yard. The team with the ball calls "Rennie-aye-over," and throws the ball over the house. If the other team catches the ball they run around the house and capture another player by hitting them with the ball. Way fun.